I have to admit, there's something appealing to me about the 'new year, new you' idea that floats around at the start of every new year. The idea of transforming oneself at an arbitrary time...it's kind of like, why not? Right? And the fact that this new year started on a Monday, well, that felt like the freshest of fresh starts.
But at this point I know that while I can continue to change and grow, and seek out change and growth...at my core, I'm still the same person I've always been. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. I always felt like I was fairly self-aware, but I now I know that gaining that self-awareness happens over an entire lifetime. I'm trying to sit and be with myself - with my thoughts and feelings - more often. That's one of the hardest things for me to do. These past couple of years have been tough, and sometimes I feel like I spend too much time dwelling on the past. But I think if I can really tune into what's going on in my mind and in my heart, I can spend more time in the present. A lot of the time I'm either dragging myself into the past, or hurtling myself into the future. And neither of those are particularly helpful places to stay. So as I move forward in this new year, I'll continue to strive to understand and love myself as best I can - building on the growth and change that has happened before, and knowing that the process is ongoing and ever evolving.
